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Hehe, to this day I can’t listen to “Just Can’t Wait to be King” without thinking of my once good friend.

But the memories are really good, and while he lasted she was an amazing person.

So in the end, it all works out.





I love watching Disney movies when you’re older and come across scenes like this. I laughed for five minutes.

Hades was the original sassy gay friend.

Of course he is the sassy gay friend, look at him he is flaming.

this post is perfect

(Source: dancingtilldawn)

Via Where No One Goes




and annoying idiots


and then theres me



(Source: hummussexual)

Okay, disregard all of my prior drama.  Things went a lot smoother than I anticipated today.

I got a question for all of you.

So, to those of me who know me in person and know my particular predicament, the girl I talked about in gym is NOT the girl I am about to talk about.  I’ve decided the first girl is not for me, I will explain in person some other time.

Okay, so, I am friendly with this girl I know.  She is sweet, and she is very beautiful.  I won’t lie, I’ve always kinda had a crush on her, but there were some problems.  1.) She is WAY out of my league, and 2.) She already had a better guy in her life.  I just think she is so neat, from her laugh to her smile.  I don’t know her as well as I could, though, so it would be kinda awkward to go and actually ask her out.  And whenever I say “hey, we should hang out”, the entire group of friends we’re both with says “EW NO!”

(sigh)  Unfortunately, I have obtained the reputation of being the annoying, hyper, loud, obnoxious white kid.  My hyper-ness is just me trying to make people laugh, because when people laugh, people like you more.  Obviously that approach has made them more against me than with me, so now I’m truly going for the quiet approach.  

So where I actually WANT to get to know her better, I can’t even ask her to hang out without being thought of like a creep or a weirdo.  

She’s smart, clever, and beautiful.  She’s girl way out of my league and has better tastes in guys, but still enough of an impact to leave an impression on me.

What do I do?  Where do I proceed?  I don’t want to constantly barrage her with “Do you wanna hang out? Do you wanna hang out?”…I usually have all the answers and know what to do, i’m seriously freaking out with this.  This is so new to me.







They can leap 36 feet

As in leap forward 36 feet

They don’t jump 36 feet into the fucking sky do you know how terrifying that would be the human race wouldn’t have survived because we’d have all had heart attacks while still in Africa


I just spent two minutes laughing harder at this than I probably should have.  

(Source: boypart)

Alright, this is just something I’m going to have to live with.

She’s right with what she said, of course.

I wish her all the best.

I’m sorry for this block of text, it’s just necessary.

First post in a very long while will be on a negative note, so I’m sorry in advance.

And I just don’t know where to begin.

Sunday night:  After a very long week of HSPAs, being in the orchestra of the school play, and the SAT followed by being in the orchestra the same evening, I woke up and looked at my workload for the week.  So many tests in my most important subjects, tests I was not ready in the least for in the first place.  The medicine I had been taking for some bad anxiety- yes, I take medicine- has not been doing it’s job the past few weeks, and I just completely fell over the edge.  I was worse than I was before the meds, getting incredibly, insatiably furious for no reason, lashing out yelling for nothing and breaking down crying.  It was so bad, I had to miss two days of school to make sure I was completely calm again.  My teachers had been very understanding, allowing me to take the tests I missed next week.  I couldn’t get to my doctor until yesterday, and she ended up giving me the next dosage up on the medicine, as well as a prescription for a small dosage of Xanax.  Xanax.  Yes, it’s come to the point where my anxiety and lashing out is so bad, my doctor has to give an adolescent teenager Xanax.  

To make matters worse, the closest friend I’ve ever had is ignoring me.  She did this before during the summer, and she had a somewhat reasonably explanation.  Her technique is that if someone is being a pest and needs to be ignored, then he will be.  But here’s the thing, she never gave me ANYwarning, any explanation.  I sat there for a month, wondering what happened, getting mad and upset that she wasn’t responding to me.  Now, here I am at the absolute lowest point I have ever reached, and I don’t even have her to talk to.  There is such a mixture of excruciating rage and desperate longing inside of me.  My tears and rolling of my cheeks into the cracks of my keyboard, wasted on a pitiful rant on a blog site.  

I don’t get my new dosage of the anti-anxiety until Monday, and at this rate, I don’t know if I will last that long without another meltdown.

Please, you know who you are who is ignoring me.  Of all the times I’ve ever needed to see you, just for a little while, it is now.

Please, don’t let me sink any lower…

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